Fragile Ego? Stifle It.

My ego, such as it is, was recently squashed into the dust and I found myself in the process of deleting my 'blog. I ended up just going to bed. In the morning, I took a handful of aspirin, my medications, and had some coffee. Needless to say, I decided to keep my 'blog, despite a shrill voice in my head that kept telling me to stop embarrasing myself.

The main reason for this "flip-flop" (in the parlance of the day) is the ongoing support of the Chubb Group, Kerr McGee, and viewers like you. Actually, it's because I had my brother and a couple of friends who were on my ass about being a self-pitying boob. My brother wrote, "I have already amounted to nothing, so join the club." Strangely, that means a lot to me. Probably because I see Kent as a big success in life. He seems to piss away money like a pisser would piss away piss, and he has a really excellent coffee-maker. And then there is Donna, my ex-fiancee, who told me, "Quit pissing me off with this self-loathing bullshit and get back to writing the good stuff." There's nothing subtle or maudlin about that commentary. Anne said, "Ah, I see we're doing this again." The fourth friend I heard from today, who will remain nameless, also spoke highly of my 'blog and my writing in general.

Again, I respect all of these people, although I question their judgement when it comes to choosing me as a friend. Anyway, because they slapped me around and told me to shut the fuck up, I got over a moment of crushing self-hatred. Those are common with me, but when it comes to writing I try to convince myself that it is a worthwhile endeavor. True or not, it does me good.

Besides, who wants to read or hear this pity shit. I know that it's boring, unless it is punctuated by a magnificently self-destructive act, like jumping off the John Hancock Building or going to Mohegan Sun. Anyway, thanks everyone.