An Epidemic Of Judgmental Cruelty

Excellent commentary, Apocalypse Cow. I couldn't have said it better myself. It just occurred to me that a friend of mine is writing a dissertation about obesity in America, as part of her endeavor to get a Master's degree. If memory serves, part of it has to do with the way the media refers to an "obesity epidemic." So some good will come from this study about "socially contagious" obesity; Clare will have more to write about.

Just think of how many stereotypes exist about obesity. It's supposedly indicative of a lack of moral fiber, stupidity and laziness. These depictions in popular culture are pretty common, and those who complain about them are considered overly-sensitive. I have a fantastic sense of humor and don't really have a problem with fat jokes. But this New England Journal of Medicine study is different from Eddie Murphy in a fat suit, or Monty Python's exploding obese bastard. As I mentioned in my last post, one of the scientists involved in the study said (on CNN) that he didn't want to stigmatize or socially isolate obese people. Then in the very next sentence he stated that having fat friends "normalizes" obesity and will cause weight gain. He went on to say that even if you don't have fat friends directly, fat friends in your social circle (a friend of a friend) can lead to the aforementioned normalization and increase your weight. In a society that celebrates youth and thinness and attacks fat people as dumb gluttons, I can't think of a better way to socially isolate and stigmatize than to say what he did. The fact that it was a peer-reviewed study provides a patina of respectability to the poorly drawn conclusions, which are mostly made by lay people who hear or read about the study but never actually read it themselves.

There's nothing good about being obese. My brother and I have been that way all our lives. And it really pisses me off when people diminish our stuggle. Eat less and exercise is what I hear and read. Writer Betsy Hart of the Scripps Howard News Service puts it this way, "[obesity is] about a generation of us who just can't say no to anything, including food. But it's becoming increasingly clear that it's also very much about a food culture that feeds that lust, pun intended." The myth is embraced and even celebrated. Given the abject misery that obesity causes, if losing weight was an easy thing we would have done it a long time ago. I can't speak for myself, but my brother is extremely intelligent and a very hard-worker. He also has a strong will and when he is determined to do something, it gets done. Back in the day he played and taught tennis. Hours and hours of hard work and dedication paid off...he was outstanding. He even went to a high-priced tennis camp in Vermont and stood out in the crowd. He also used to be a chef. When he realized that there was no real future in it, and that the work-to-pay ratio didn't add up, he went to school and learned about computers. The result of that was a considerable increase in his quality of life. He knows how to put himself into something totally, and is a thoughtful, hard working fellow.

My point is that he has the desire to lose weight, and his abilities are considerable. Yet he struggles with obesity. The advice to "eat less and exercise" is a cruel and dismissive insult. But people never pass on an opportunity to feel superior to others. I do it, too. Like Apocalypse Cow, I look down on southerners, too. But that's different. I've been down south many times, and those people are really twisted, in general. Ha!

I don't mean to go on a rant here, but I feel compelled to mention that "overweight" and "obese" are terms used in the media as if they were synonymous. They aren't. I sometimes hear the figure that 2/3's of Americans are obese or overweight. That includes people who are 5 or 10 pounds over. The social stigma attached to obesity, as well as the pathology that causes it, is very different than having a few extra pounds. For one, the "ideal" weight, as defined by doctors, is somewhat arbitrary. Ten pounds above your ideal weight does not have any concrete negative health impact. In a sense, overweight is an aesthetic judgment while "obese" is a more concrete clinical assessment.

Certainly, environment contributes greatly to obesity. But studies also show that "multiple genes" make the problem much more likely, and difficult to overcome, in some people. This may even be true in select populations, based on shared heredity. The recent obesity studies, and news stories, that have come out lately have revealed a sad truth about Americans. Not that we are weak gluttons that can't say no to cookies and cake, but that we are simple-minded and keen to judge others. I guess that's more fun than looking at the science and understanding that obesity is based on environmental, social and genetic factors. The deck is stacked against some of us.

As I mentioned before, the media stories about being fat have bothered me more than they should. I dropped out of high school simply to avoid gym class. I got my diploma by making a unique arrangement with the school. I'm not sure what my weight was back then, but I was "morbidly obese." I was treated like a punk for skipping PE, and only one teacher spoke to me about how my weight contributed to my truancy, and my desire to quit. Everyone else acted like it was a mystery why I acted the way I did. Now I realize that I should have stood up for myself and related my problem more openly. But those teachers who treated me like shit are not blameless. That's all past now, but the way I felt back then about how my body made my life so miserable is definitely contributing to my anxiety and self-loathing now. Even with all the weight I lost, I'm still fat. The thoughts of suicide, the self-harm and the isolation that have taken place in the past couple of weeks are connected with this "socially contagious" study. I just turned 35, and my weight loss surgery took almost 200 pounds off my body, yet the judgmental attitude and over-simplification of my plight still has fantastic emotional currency with me. It's like I'm back in high school, hiding in an empty classroom and reading, waiting for gym class to end.