Friday, February 17, 2012

The Little Things

Impy, preparing for a night of blissful cuddling with the humans.

This morning I'm going to post a piece of music that is magnificent to my ears. I'm not particularly sophisticated when it comes to music, but I know that it can have a powerful effect on the humans. Recently, my uncle died and it has me thinking of death, and that I don't have much time left. The weight issues alone should have me in cardiac arrest within the next five years. The testicular cancer could have gotten me, as could have any of the surgeries I've had. Liver failure is always hanging out there, given the amount of medications I take. And the drug abuse earlier in life.
In the meantime, I'll listen to a lot of music and spend as much time as I can with by beloved Nancy. Sometimes it is difficult to put these things into words. Frankly, it often is. As Walt Whitman once said, “What is that you express in your eyes? It seems to me more than all the print I have read in my life.” Or written.

My head is spinning from my morning medication, which includes Effexor and lamotrigine, along with levoxythyroxine. The epileptic seizures have increased a bit in the past few weeks. They continue to annoy. 

Last night, like most nights, Nancy and I, along with Annie, Ghost, and Impy all curled up next to each other and found warmth in each others paws and arms. I'm 39 years old, and I pretty much get what this life is about. It's mostly pain and awkward suffering. But at the moments when it's just Nancy and I, perhaps with our furry little children, it all doesn't seem so bad. 

And as I said, music is a fine thing, too.

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